My Goal Mindset

Something I have realized over the past year is that setting goals is not about the things you want, it’s about how you want to feel.

I’m willing to guess that you have heard the concept of that no amount of money will make you happy. I want to take this a little further and talk about your intention behind a goal in general. When we set a goal, it’s really not about the actual accomplishing the goal. Its about the journey of getting there, the feeling of accomplishing something that you worked so hard for and how it will continue to make you feel day after day.

Often times when we set a goal we may experience or observe something that sparks our motivation to get there. Maybe this motivation comes from a person you see in a magazine, a family member or a classmate/coworker. But what about that person or thing that they have accomplished makes you want it to? What will you feel? Will you feel accomplished, loved, respected, smart or beautiful when you have it to?

When we shift our perspective from accomplishing a goal with the mindset of wanting something to wanting to feel a certain way, we make an important shift from having to check a box with expectations of what it has to look like, to finding our way to a feeling we long for.

For me, ever since I was a little girl I had the simple goal to live in Southern California. It took many years but I finally accomplished my goal and quickly grew to realize that nothing about where I was living made me happier than I was before. I was attached to thinking that my life would be amazing as soon as I moved to the beach and had beach-y friends. Even though I now love my friends and live where I always wanted to I had to take a step back and ask myself what I was expecting to feel when moving here...I accomplished my goal, so why does it not feel like it?! I had to realize that my goal was not about where I wanted to live, but about the feeling of sun filled days and happy friends. From there, I was able to cultivate that feeling in my life by finding those friends and appreciating the sunny days even more.